


Hold On (based off of the AMV by grayskyluna)

by hoard_of_stars



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Canonical Character Death, Dads of Marmora (Voltron), Dark Past, Everyone Needs A Hug, Faked Death, Fluff and Angst, Gay Keith (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) Needs a Hug, Lance (Voltron) Needs a Hug, M/M, Minor Character Death, Not What It Looks Like, Survivor Guilt, based off of the klance amv Hold On, current klance, i wrote this instead of studying lol, if ur reading this u obviously wanted angst, lots of klangst, sibling relationship nyma and regris, this is my first ao3 fic so why not kick it off with attempted suicide, u know what just sit down and enjoy, what are tags there is a tag for everything
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-17
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-10-14 17:35:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17512940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoard_of_stars/pseuds/hoard_of_stars
Summary: Keith was lying on the bathroom door when they finally managed to bust in the door.'Hold on, I still want youCome back, I still need youLet me take your hand, I'll make it rightI swear to love you all my lifeHold on, I still need you'Lance isn't strong enough to let go.





	Hold On (based off of the AMV by grayskyluna)

**Keith's POV**

We were lounging in our living room, watching My Sister's Keeper, by Jodi Picoult. I was sprawled out on our old, worn-out couch with the stuffing bursting out from the seams, letting my arms and feet dangle off the edges. Lance was lying on his stomach on the carpet, staring up at the tv intently, long limbs splayed every which way. Every so often, he would glance back at me as if to check if I was still there, and then steal popcorn from the bowl that was balancing so precariously on the arm of the couch.

"Mullet..." he whispered, halfway through the movie, at the part where Anna had finished her bone marrow procedure and was asking for her mom to stay with her.

"Yeah?" I said, keeping my eyes trained on the movie screen even though Lance was propping himself up on his elbows and leaning on my calves.

"You know... if you were in the hospital, I'd stay with you."

"How does that relate to anything?" I asked him, lips twitching. He shrugged.

"I just think you should know that. If you were in the hospital they'd have to drag me out to get me to leave." He tilted his head back to meet my eyes, grinning cheekily.

"You're such a sap," I groaned, twisting around so that I was laying on my stomach, my legs were pointing up at the ceiling, and my forehead was touching his. "But I guess that's why I put up with you."

"Aw, you know you love me, Vermillion," he pouted slightly.

"Nah."

He huffed and went silent. After a good twenty minutes, I began to think I had truly upset him and started to worry. I opened my mouth to say something because such silence from Lance McClain was just plain unnatural, but out of the blue he whipped his head around, grabbed my torso, and flipped me onto the heavily blanketed floor. I yelped in surprise as he towered over me, smirking in that self-satisfied way.

"You _love_ me." He insisted, speaking the sentence with a slight trace question in his tone like it was a fact he was reaffirming. I thought about saying no again but then saw the look in his eyes, like a deer trapped in headlights. "Yeah, I do," I admitted. Almost immediately, the tension eased from his muscles and face.

"What? You thought I didn't?" I said jokingly, shrugging his hands off of my shoulders and making myself comfortable in his lap.

"Wh- no, of course not. I never doubted it for a second," he said smoothly. I scoffed and craned my neck backward at an odd angle.

"Yeah, right." I pecked his cheek briefly and ignored the warm feeling settling in my gut as he wrapped a blanket around our shoulders. I resigned myself to watch Brian try to piece together the mess of shattered dreams and broken soul that was his son, and finally hugging him.

An eternity later, a sharp _BRRRRING_ disrupted our drowsy bliss. I, in my half-asleep state, made an undignified whining noise and cuddled closer against Lance's chest. Somewhere in the past half-hour, I had wound up with my legs wrapped around his waist, face buried in the crook of his neck. And I, still half-asleep, was seriously opposed to having to move from this very comfortable position. However, the doorbell kept screaming all the more insistently, and eventually one of us had to bite.

Lance took the fall for both of us. He picked me up bridal-style even though I was squirming, plopped my pathetic self down on the sofa, and ventured downstairs to answer the door. I figured he would be back in just a few seconds. 

But a few seconds turned into a few minutes, then ten whole minutes. It was at the fifteen-minute mark that I decided I should probably go check on the mess that is my boyfriend. After all, I thought disgruntledly, it doesn't take that long to answer the door.

"Lance!" I called from the top of the stairwell. No response. I took a few tentative steps down the stairs, listening hard.

It sounded like someone was...  _crying_? I shook my head.

"Can I please stay the night, Lance?" a voice choked out. "I don't want to go home because my family is going to be on my case about this, they always are, and besides, you're the best at making me feel better."

An angry flush crept up y neck. Who  _was_ this hoe, anyway? Was she really implying what I think she was implying?

"Can I?" the voice asked again.

There was a pause. _Don't say yes, don't say yes, come on, Lance, don't say yes..._

"Sure you can, Nyma. My doors are always open to you." His voice was playful and sly, like it was when he was flirting. _Nyma_? No... no, it couldn't be. It must be some different Nyma... it had to be. Scowling, I crept farther down the stairs and ducked behind the banister. 

"But... you only have one door..." she sniffled.

"Exactly!" Lance grinned widely as Nyma giggled a little through her tears. I chose that moment to step out from behind the stairs, clearing my throat. Nyma yelped and stepped back while Lance looked anxious. Her eyes widened with recognition as she peered at me through tear-flooded eyes. My heart jumped up into my throat. 

_Oh god, not here, not now... please, not now._

"Oh... right... I forgot to mention... this is my boyfriend, Keith. He moved in with me a few months ago. Keith, this is Nyma."

"We've met." she said shortly. The tension in the room increased tenfold as everyone very pointedly looked away from each other. 

"O _kaaaaaay..._ so, Keithy, Nyma's going to be staying with us for a while. Can she have the guest room for the night?" 

I huffed a little bit. And then Lance continued, "You can share with me!!"

I perked up a little at that. Lance makes a great body pillow; he's so warm and comfortable and he doesn't even mind it.

"Let's get going, then," Lance said impatiently. "I don't want to miss the ending of the movie."

 _My Sister's Keeper_ was  _our_ movie,  _our_ book. We had been paired up for a school project on it and had fallen in love with the plotline... and each other. 

A smile was on my face as we made our way up the stairs. 

"I'm pretty sure you know the layout of this place, Nym'. The kitchen's second on the left, my room is next to the bathroom, and Keith can show you where the guest room is." He  turned his gaze to me. "And while you're there you can get your stuff, okay? Pajamas, blankets, the red lion?"

I felt my face turn as red as... well... the lion plushie I had seen at the mall on one of our dates. I couldn't resist purchasing the entire set and gifting one to each of our friends for Christmas. THen again, it had been almost two years since I had seen any of them...

"Only if you have Blue." I grinned, tearing myself away from those melancholy thoughts. 

"You know I'd never get rid of her..." Lance said playfully. "Now get! I want you both back in this room in five minutes so we can finish the movie!"

She's watching the movie with us? My stomach turned over, and not because I get really gross and sob-y when Anna dies. It was just that this was  _our_ book/movie, something we never shared with anyone else. It was something untainted that neither of us had questioned. 

"Sir, yes, sir." I said with a mock-salute as I marched down the hall to the guest room with Nyma behind me. The air was palpable with the tension stirring between us, until Nyma finally spoke.

"Aren't you going to say anything?"

"What is there to say?" I said shortly, inclining my head at the bathroom on our right.

"Oh, jeez, I don't know..." she said, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Maybe where the hell you've been all these years. What really happened on the mission with the Blades. Why you decided running away from your problems- from us!- was a good idea!"

"And maybe that isn't our business," I said smoothly. 

That was it. The spark that caused the explosion.

The breath was knocked out of my lungs as she shoved me against the wall, swiftly backhanding me. 

"Not my business?  _Not my business_? Regris was like my  _brother_ , Keith! You were like family! Not just to me, to Voltron, to the entire coalition!"

"Some family," I choked out. She twisted my arms tighter behind my back. 

"Do you know how fucking inconsolable Shiro was after you left? Allura could barely hold herself together! Coran refused to believe it until the funeral, and do you know how hard he sobbed when he finally had to accept it? Hunk couldn't cook anything you liked- which was nearly everything, mind you-  without bursting into tears and excusing himself and Pidge- Pidge cried over you, Keith, she fucking  _cried_! She cried for hours on end and you- you- you still can't bring yourself to give a shit about anyone but yourself! But, yeah, some family."

"It was necessary," I grunted. "I- I couldn't-"

She didn't give me a chance to finish. "Couldn't  _what_ , Keith? Bring yourself to think we'd think any less of you after the mission? Couldn't face your mistakes? Couldn't leave us to think you hadn't killed yourself and instead ran away like-"

She took a ragged breath, and I realized she was crying. "A-"

" _Coward?_ " 

With a growl of rage, I broke free from her grip and wheeled around. "Don't you dare call me a coward, Nyma. Don't you  _dare._ You think I wanted to leave you all? You think I wanted this? I loved you all, you were as close as it came to the family I never had. I couldn't hurt any of you, not after Regris. I wanted to save him, I wanted to save them all!"

"But you never could have, Keith! That's so stupidly irrational of you and I- that's so much like you to say!" She glared at me and finally burst out, "I missed you, alright? We thought you were d-dead and-"

She broke off angrily, trying to decide what to say. Finally she shook her head, socked me in the shoulder, wiping her tears with her other arm and stalked off into the guest room. 

I stood there in shock, holding my arm.

_The coalition mourned me?_

No. I couldn't think like that. I left them. They thought I was dead. They wouldn't mourn someone they thought did something as cowardly as committed suicide. 

Still, my chest ached. I had missed them over the years. I wanted to hug Shiro and joke with Hunk in the kitchen and listen to Pidge ramble on about Rover 2.0 and pilot the ship with Allura and snort at Coran's dad jokes. I wanted my family, I realized. 

But then again, I thought ruefully, shaking my head, they probably wouldn't want me.

**Author's Note:**

> So... yeah. This is my first Ao3 fic because fanfiction.net is honestly trash. I just spent half an hour talking a friend I don't know well enough out of suicide and god, I'm so scared because she told me she didn't feel like talking anymore. This fic will turn out okay in the end, I promise you guys.
> 
> Credit goes to GraySkyLuna on YouTube for the inspiration off of her Klance animatic, Hold On.


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